From our March 22, 2001, edition.

Editor's Note: This is all in good fun. No actual turkeys have been harmed in this contest, and all candidates have been good sports.

Feathers fly in race to be county's Turkey King 

Roger Estlack, Clarendon Enterprise

This turkey found himself on the wrong side of the law last weekend and ended up in the Donley County Jail. He was charged with trespassing near the local radio station and was held for two days before being released.   Photo courtesy Jondel Moffet

Turkey King candidate Vic Jeter clung to his lead this week despite further allegations of election tampering.

Just one week after Jeter was suspected of redistributing votes among his opponents, the local banker was accused of threatening to abscond with his voting jar. Election judge Linda Gray said Jeter came by Duckwall’s Sunday and made the threat.

“He said, ‘I’m gonna steal that jar before I leave here,’” Gray reported.

Duckwall’s employees hid the jar from Jeter’s sticky fingers and thus preserved the integrity of the voting system for the time being.

Some analysts say the Jeter campaign is one of the most corrupt in the history of the Turkey Kingdom.

“I think it’s just terrible,” Gray said. “We’ve always had a peaceful election. I don’t know what his problem is.”

The shenanigans may have cost Jeter some points, however, with the ever-popular Mayor Tex Selvidge closing the gap between himself and the frontrunner. This week’s Enterprise / Gobbler Poll showed Jeter leading Selvidge by just $1.42. Last week, Jeter led by a margin of $4.55.

Car dealer Trey Chamberlain, insurance salesman Walt Knorpp, and County Judge Jack Hall maintained their third through fifth place positions without making great strides in the poll. Other minor candidates traded places, but Maurice Risley continued to hold firm in last place with $2.28.

Meanwhile, one of the turkeys making its way around the county found itself on the wrong side of the law Saturday night.

Jondel Moffet reported the turkey was “fowling” the area and consorting with unsavory characters near the KEFH radio studios. The bird resisted a citizen arrest and refused to talk, but a tag on its neck said, “To Delbert, From Jim R.”

The turkey was booked into the Donley County Jail on charges of trespassing where it was held for two days. Sheriff Butch Blackburn said the bird “meant no offense” and was “well behaved” while doing time.

Unconfirmed reports said the bird was actually placed on suicide watch due to being depressed over being so ugly.

The bird was released on its own recognizance Monday and was doing community service at the Burton Memorial Library at press time.

In an unrelated matter, one of the wooden turkeys has apparently flown the coop. It was last seen in Don Stone’s yard before it disappeared last Thursday.

Chamber of Commerce Executive Director Judy Burlin is hoping the bird will turn up and is asking whoever took the poor creature to “just please bring it back.”

Burlin says Stone is not considered a suspect in the bird’s disappearance. “He really liked that turkey,” she said.

Anyone with information on the lost fowl can call the Chamber or the Library.

The election for Donley County’s King Turkey has entered its fifth week, and pictures of all 12 turkey candidates are on money jars at Duckwall’s. The winner will be the turkey who has the most money at the end of the contest. Cast your vote today to make your voice heard.

The king will be crowned during the Turkey Strut Festival on April 21-22.

During the contest, anyone can have a turkey put in someone’s yard for a birthday, anniversary, or gag gift for a $5 donation to the Tourism Council. Call Carolyn Blackerby at the Burton Library at 874-3685 for your order and delivery.

New rules this week limit a turkey’s roosting time in a yard to 48 hours. Citizens who find a turkey in their yard must pay $5 to have it removed and can put it in someone else’s yard for another $5.

Money raised goes to the Donley County Tourism Council to help promote our fair county.